Static
by DiscordianSamba
Summary: His thoughts were like static in his head. (Seiji POV during episodes 46 and 47.)


tfw you're suddenly hit by hachapre feels at eleven at night and you end up writing a whole oneshot before you really know what's going on. Whoops.

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 **static**

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His thoughts were like static in his head. Just when he thought he'd be able to grasp one, it fizzled out, crackling like it had never been there.

All that was left was the overwhelming surge of anger and hatred, which he knew had already swallowed him whole. The need to reach out, to destroy- to eliminate anyone that stood in his path, that got in his way.

There were four girls before him. They were saying something to him- the one with pink hair kept calling out, over and over. What was she saying? He couldn't grasp it. He thought it felt a bit familiar, but in what way, he couldn't place.

He couldn't think.

All he wanted to do was fight, to lash out. As if this would somehow drive out all of this anger and hate from within him, leaving him free of it.

It would not, some part of him knew. Even if he managed, what would that leave him as? Did he even have anything beyond this? Wouldn't he just become an empty shell?

The crystal. They were saying something about destroying the crystal. _His_ crystal. He couldn't let them do that. He didn't know why, but he couldn't let them do that. Whoever these girls were, he wouldn't let them have it.

They sure talked a lot, though. Every so often, the static in his head would clear long enough for him to vaguely understand what they were saying- not that it made any sense. It almost sounded like they were claiming that they knew him, but that was impossible. There was nothing before this, and there would be nothing after this.

All would fall into despair. All would be eliminated from this world, taking their cursed love with them.

Then what of him? It didn't matter, there was no purpose for him other than this. He was here to fulfill the orders of his god- only that, and nothing more.

He would crush those four, and then the world.

They struck against his crystal, the one with pink hair trying to force her way past the barrier with all her might. It didn't matter in the end- she was forced back, forced back the new wave of hatred that gripped him, by the loud burst of static in his head.

They were in despair. No, not quite there yet. Just a little more. Just another push.

When they lay on the ground, broken and defeated, for some reason, he felt as if something in him should stir. Nothing did.

The one with pink hair kept calling out over and over again, what he now understood was some sort of name. _Seiji_ , she cried, over and over again, until he was sick of hearing it. Whose name was that? Why wouldn't she stop saying already? Just shut up already!

It didn't matter. Where they were going, those four didn't have the power left to follow. Even if they did, he would fight them again, and the results would only be the same. The power that his god had given him couldn't be defeated by anyone, he wouldn't let it.

His god's planet was cold, empty. Quiet, unlike his head.

Past the static in his head, he realized that there had been something here once, but no longer. Probably not for a long, long time.

Something other than anger and hatred stirred.

He didn't know what it was.

Even if he wanted to think about it, he couldn't. There was too much noise.

Those four were back. He'd stop them before they arrived here. Something about them had changed, but he paid it no mind. It wouldn't change anything.

First it was four, then it was three. Blue, yellow, purple. They called out, just like the pink one had.

The static got louder.

The blue one couldn't aim. No, she wasn't trying to aim. A smokescreen.

The yellow one was trying to go for his crystal. He wouldn't let her. But she was clever, she tried to trap him. He wouldn't let her do that either.

The purple one faced him head on. Not with magic, but with her fists. He responded. When she had knocked him away, he thought that something deep inside of him sparked, past the static. Not thoughts, but motion.

Motion. He knew this motion. It was deeply rooted inside of him.

They'd all trapped him, now. It was fruitless. Their magic buckled underneath the crystal's power, shattering into pieces.

Then it too, shattered into pieces, struck head on by a powerful, unyielding magic. What was the pink one fighting so hard for, some dim part of him wondered. She'd even shattered apart her own power with the force of the blow, using up every ounce of the white form's strength.

She was back as she was now, the first time he'd seen her. She was still talking- but her mood had changed. She was still calling out that name, but her tone had changed.

Confusing. The pink was too confusing. She just made the static louder.

He just wanted her to shut up, to stop talking already. The static crackled in his head, overpowering everything else, rendering him unable to think. Maybe if he wiped her away, the static would disappear.

The power that surged through him, the hatred that surged through him- that was not his own, some part of him dimly realized. It was the god's- _his_ god. His body was a vessel for it, a way to channel it all.

That's all. That's all, and yet...

 _Seiji_.

Just for a moment, as the pink one absorbed that massive fireball of hatred, the static in his head cleared.

That was his name.

Then the static was back, and his body braced itself to counterattack. The pink one was coming, and he had to be ready to fight off whatever she had planned.

It wasn't an attack.

It was... what was this. He couldn't remember.

Warm hands wrapped around his body, drawing him close. The static crackled, clearing for a moment, spitting out a single word- _embrace_.

And then another- _Megumi_.

Megumi. So this girl was Megumi.

She wasn't alone. Hime. Omori. Hikawa.

Something within him gave way, though he didn't know what. The static crackled, making one last attempt to consume his thoughts- before it sputtered out, leaving his head clear, free to think.

Sagara Seiji. He was Sagara Seiji. He wasn't some vessel of hatred and anger- though he had allowed himself to be turned into that, had shown a moment's weakness, that had then been exploited, turned against him.

Turned against those he loved dear.

He'd hurt them.

It was almost enough for him to want to retreat back into the sanctuary of the static again, so he wouldn't have to think about the pain he'd caused the four of them- his dearest friends. But no, he wouldn't run away from these feelings like that, not when they had been fighting so hard to bring him out of them.

Not when not excepting his own feelings were what got him into this in the first place.

Not when they were all waiting for him.

 _"Welcome back, Seiji."_

 _"I'm home, Megumi."_


End file.
